Following my last post about being true to yourself, I had a comment posted by Carmen. The comment was very detailed and insightful and with the authors permission, I am going to post it here as it brings up some good points and interesting observations. Hope you enjoy.

“I’ve read a few “spiritual” books. All in an attempt to make sense of the variety of seemingly incomprehensible, un-fathomable dimensions of being human. And of course, it is also my attempt to understand the unfolding of my own life. I think most people can agree that “If only we trust and follow our hearts…things work out in the end.” But many times, in the depth of a very tough situation, when one does not know where the next pay check is going to come from to pay for the rent, one returns to the old job because it offers financial security. As unhappy as one maybe with his/her current job, there is at least a warm place to live, and money to pay the rent. In other words, “reality” scares the heck out of most of us.

I supposed if we “go with the flow” and not struggle against the “dissatisfactions” that we experience with our job, quitting one’s job to “follow our bliss” may just not be the right move. Because what is causing job dissatisfaction is the expectations we have of how other people should behave or respond, of how things should flow at work in order to achieve our goals, or as simple as: “get out of my way, and just let me get my work done.” We are all working for paychecks. Some pull their load; some don’t. This is one of the many sources of job dissatisfactions, in addition to heavy “politics” at work place. For as long as human beings hold on their work grudges (past thinking), and project their fear of the same thing could happen again (future thinking), there will always be heartaches at work place and in relationships.

In other words, “Go with the flow” could go either way. Quit my job and “go with the flow.” Things will work out in the end. OR, stay in my job, and “go with the flow.” Stop trying to make things the way I want it.
Stop trying to change people, because no amount of policies or rules would make people change until they see the value of change. And the change may not happen in this life time.

Perhaps we, human beings, try very hard to make sense of life. It may very well be that life is not meant to be understood. “If we trust and follow our hearts…things work out in the end” has an underlying assumption that life has something promising for us in the end. However, history has revealed over and over that many of those who follow their hearts either ended up being beheaded, burnt at stake, or crucified, or in milder form, became outcasts of society, or “heretics” in religious community.

In nature, everything unfolds according to their natural rhythm, a rhythm that follows the rhythm of nature.
No one tree reprimands the other tree for growing crooked. After two animals fight, they each walk away from each other, lick their wounds, and move on.

Human beings, however, tend to re-member old, “unresolved” issues years down the road until their body is festered with old stuff that eventually manifest as psychological turmoil or physiological imbalance leading to dis-ease of the body. In other words, the gift of memory can be both a curse or a gift. it all depends all how quickly we let go and move on. I beleive, this applies at work place. There will always be disagreements at work place. It is the nature of Being. I wonder if we shift our perspective and look at conflicts as opportunity for self-expansion, a chance to move beyond our present understanding of human relationship to a higher level of consciousness; i.e., every negative, unpleasant encounter is a “form” unfolding, happening at the right time and the right place to bring us the possibilities of moving to a higher level of consciousness. And this higher level of consciousness is the “knowing” that there is no end to human conflicts. Conflicts brings on contrast. Contrast provides us the opportunity to choose. We can choose to stay ‘inside,” and not reisit the flow; or we can choose to “pull out” and not resist the flow. In the end, both has the potential to offer us the sought upon “relief” or “things work out in the end.”

I think we are so entrenched in our current mode of being (including myself), i.e., we haul all the aches and pain,and unfairness of life from the past to the present; then, we project what could happen, what is likely to happen in the future (control of the future) and drag our fear and anxiety of the future to the present time, and we forget to live in the moment. This very moment that is full of nothing but silence and peace.

This may very well be the meaning of the rise of Dementia. It is a socio-cultural expression of the evolution of the human psyche that is so rooted in the past and clutching on to the future and fail to live in the present. Perhaps the state of Dementia is a reminder to all of us to live the present moment, because in one blip, this present becomes the past. Future is meaningless until we make conscious efforts to go with the flow as this moment unfold in front of us. Individuals who “suffer” from the condition called Dementia do not have a sense of the past nor the future. Their sense of the present is blip by blip. One blip is not necessarily connected to the next blip. It simply IS, most specially when the condition progresses to its late stage. At its late stage, they have no ability to take care of themselves. They rely on others to take care of them. This is also true when we all get too old to take care of ourselves, with or without Dementia.

The question I ask, therefore, is: Is life essentially teleological if everything is meant to be transient? Is life meant to be meaningful? “Meaningfulness” implies an answer, a relief. But every answer, every relief is temporary; there is no end to problems, to conflicts. The moment one problem is solved, another kind of problem arises. It is difficult to make sense of all the “inequalities” which lead to all the clamoring for “equality” in life. What seems to make sense is that “inequalities,” as a contrast, serves us the opportunity to expand, to understand deeper, to arrive at an inner knowing, to raise our awareness of the nature of Being. Problems become less intense when we learn to stop resisting, which stems from the need to control, to mold the situation thru the lens that I can see. Problems will always shows up. If there are no problems, there are no contrast, no progression, no expansion beyond the current state. Society becomes stagnant.

In the final analysis, problems are essential to life. When we stop resisting, problems become less pronounced, situation less intolerable. Anything better than this is a state of perfection. Life is never meant to be perfect. It may well be that our imperfections are meant for us to learn to live in complement of one another. i.e., my strength is your weakness and your strength is my weakness, together we complement and share this moment in ONE-ness. We only have this moment to share. The past is over, the future is in the process being created by us by how we attend to this moment. The unfolding of the future is a given. We only have NOW to live. The very essence of Being is the attention we put to this very moment.

I believe, life is this endless process of unfinished work, an eternal process we all, consciously and unconsciously, participate in. Like it or not, we take part in this eternal unfolding. There are no promising answers ahead. The only promising answer we can derive is from living in the NOW. This requires a major shift in our attitude, in the way we think, we see, we do, we relate with one another.”